Covetworthy

I had a fantastic dinner a while back that ended with the host showing us his latest purchase: a Ferrari. I’m no car girl but I had to admit it was breathtaking. (And what I do know is Husband looked at, and subsequently rubbed on, said vehicle in a way that made me avert my eyes.) A girlfriend there asked, so what’s the equivalent of a dream car for us? The dream closet. I readily agree.

Think about the parallels. The currency of the dream closet is not horsepower, but square footage. No need for speed here–I want space, preferably something with double zeros at the end. Oh, and I’ll take climate control over cruise control any day.

To me, the real value in the dream car or closet is being able to live out the Fantasy. It’s what offered behind the wheel, behind the door, albeit briefly. In my dream closet, all my once and future purchases reside, those items to adorn me while I fulfill every dream I ever had for myself. That book I’ve yet to write? Still a loose outline, but here’s the D&G skinny suit I’m wearing to the launch party. And while I patiently await that CFDA Awards invitation, I already chose my Choos.

I’ve been in this mode for a long time. Before “The Secret.” Before manifesting anything, I have been a firm believer in “in order to be it, you gotta see it.” So much of that Fantasy life is rooted in my Realife, just with more fantastical settings and ripped-from-the-headlines personalities mingling alongside my Real friends. Example? A quick grab-and-dash at Quizno’s becomes brunch with the girls at Cipriani’s, and by girlfriends, I mean my college bfs plus Diane von Furstenberg, Ms. O and Mrs. O.

Simply put, the dream closet serves a vital purpose in my life. It begets more dreams. I am limitless there. I’m never someone else, I’m always me, just more sure-footed and secure in all those fabulous threads. And sometimes, just sometimes, those outfits step out of my imagination and inspire ensembles that make appearances in my reality. And I’m the only one who knows they first started as a dream.

Surely, I’m not the only girl living the dream. Have you ever made the dream attire a reality? Share your story here. Names and identifying details will be altered to protect the innocent (most likely from 1980s fashion crimes…)

I have a little secret. I design women’s lingerie (www.lavande-swk.com) and yet my own top drawer has been woefully abandoned. My unmentionables have become just that. Not. Worth. Mentioning.

Admittedly, this isn’t something that’s important to most. Some people live by a mission statement. Or it might be crucial to make a final statement. For me, it’s all about the Understatement. (And right about now, mine is the sound of crickets chirping in overgrown fields.)

I never thought this would happen. But two babies in two years can wreak serious havoc on a girl’s mojo, ya know? So now, bottoms bounce around with no tops. Once-doted-upon lace frillies (pre-bump) nestle next to well-worn Hanky Pankys (mid-bump.) Spanx sidle up to Agent Provocateur. We recently had a weekend away from the kids and, whereas I used to plan my vacation boudoir ensembles in advance, this time I just stashed a couple fresh pairs in the bag and prayed that this would be a lights-off situation. Pathetic.

What I know is that keeping a tight lingerie wardrobe requires maintenance. (Just like missing a few days at the gym won’t hurt, but skip a year and see what happens to your ass. No, seriously, go to a mirror and look at your ass.)

So I’m airing the proverbial dirty drawers to make this promise: I am heretofore undergoing an aggressive underwear overhaul.

1. I PLEDGE to purge – anything that doesn’t inspire has got to go.
2. I PLEDGE to buy things that match. Seems redundant but some things just must be said. (And THAT goes without saying.)
3. I PLEDGE not to make purchases from catalogs – that’s cheating. I will summon up the ovarios to walk into a lingerie department or boutique, and engage the services of a sales chick to fetch what I need, regardless if she’s enviably fit or heartbreakingly geriatric.

And finally…,
4. I PLEDGE to wear everything that I buy. No saving and no second-guessing.

Stay tuned for the updates, uploads and the uplifting…

I started this blog as my personal fashionista manifesto. As a personal shopper and lingerie designer, a former buyer and fashion director and overall consumerella, I live this stuff. (Much more on my crazy and crazy blessed life in future posts…)

If there’s one thing I pride myself on (besides my shoes), it’s my deeply-ingrained Southern hospitality. I was taught to make guests feel welcome, and there’s no better way to do that than by offering a little gift. So for now until we meet again, here is my virtual welcome gift for you: A Wish.

I wish you found money: absent-mindedly stashed in the pockets of coats and jeans, or tucked covertly in the zipper compartments of purses you were about to give to Goodwill.

I wish you sales in all their glorious varieties: sample, hidden, online only, end of season, half-yearly and half off. I wish you a virtual avalanche of stock in your sizes and no lines at checkout.

I wish you parking space, trunk space and closet space.

I wish you Manolo style at Mossimo prices.

I wish you freedom from indecision, bad decision, and worst of all, buyer’s remorse.

I wish you good hair days, flawless skin and chic flats to prowl the stores like your personal catwalk. (It’s more rewarding to shop when you look like you already have it all.)

In short, I wish you the shopping equivalent of good karma.

But when you have this, remember that it is a gift. Do not boast arrogantly of your newfound riches to fellow shoppers. There, but for the grace of Gucci, go you.